Propaganda
by CasusFere
Summary: The Decepticons discover the latest Autobot propaganda campaign.


"A 'cartoon.'"

"Yes, Lord Megatron." The spy shifted nervously.

"What in the Pit is a cartoon?" Starscream demanded from one side.

Megatron glared at him. "You are an _idiot_, Starscream," he said, not wanting to admit that he wasn't sure himself. Starscream's ego didn't need the encouragement.

The Air Commander folded his arms and glared back. "Oh, like you know? So enlighten me, oh mighty leader."

"I'm not your personal dictionary," Megatron snapped.

"HA! You've got no clue, either!"

"Just shut up, Starscream."

"I-it's a form of visual entertainment," the spy informed them nervously. "Using animated drawings…"

"And the Autobots think that it will convince the human government to support them?" Megatron frowned.

"One of the Autobots' human pets believes that it will cause the human populace to see them in a more favorable light, as heroes triumphing over the evil Decepticons."

Starscream made a rude noise. "They'd have to _win_, before they can 'triumph' over anything."

"Shut _up,_ Starscream. You," Megatron pointed to the flinching spy. "Get me a copy of this 'cartoon.' Now."

"Y-yes, my lord…" The spy scrambled out.

x-x-x

"What in the Pit is that _noise?"_

"It sounds like Starscream yodeling," Skywarp muttered to Thundercracker.

"Ha ha. Funny," deadpanned Starscream.

"I believe it's called an 'opening theme,'" the spy said nervously. "It plays before each episode."

"It's hideous," Megatron said flatly.

"Recommendation: Mute," Soundwave agreed.

The Decepticons watched in mingled amusement and disgust.

"Well, they got one thing right," Starscream muttered to his wingmates, watching 'Skywarp' and 'Thundercracker' failing to apprehend a pair of Autobots outside 'Iacon'. "You two are horrible shots."

Thundercracker glared. Skywarp was staring in horrified fascination. "Why do we have three wings?"

"According to the production notes," the spy told him quietly, "The real tetrajet looked too normal. They wanted something that wouldn't have any positive associations."

"But why three wings? You wouldn't get any lift like that…"

"Plus, it looks stupid," added Thundercracker.

Skywarp's reply was cut off by a squawk from Starscream. "I don't sound like that!"

Dead silence.

"No, we call you 'Screamer' for the fun of it." Skywarp snorted.

"Oh, shove it up your tailpipe, Skywarp." He waved at the screen. "I sound like a whiny human child!"

Another pause. Skywarp sniggered. Starscream glared at his wingmate.

"We aren't shooting the Autobots." Thundercracker sounded dazed. "Why aren't we shooting the Autobots?'

Starscream turned back to the screen where the cartoon mechs seemed to be engaged in a bizarre form of hand-to-hand combat involving a great deal of jumping around and very little damage. "What the- Did we lose our weapons?"

Thundercracker shook his head, optics still fixed on the screen in horrified fascination. "Look, Megatron's still got his fusion cannon."

Starscream laughed out loud. "And look, he's getting beat down by Prime!"

Megatron growled.

"Hey, that's not what happened!" Skywarp protested.

"I think it's pretty obvious by now that they don't care what really happened," Starscream sniffed. "Wouldn't make very good propaganda if they did, now would it."

"We're not shooting the Autobots. Again," Thundercracker said, pained. "We just woke up in the middle of a pile of unconscious Autobots... and we're just leaving them there."

"Blame Skywarp," Starscream said. "He's the first one to wake up."

"Hey!" Skywarp protested. "That totally never happened, either! I so would have taken advantage of the situation!"

"By what, spiking everyone's fuel tanks with sugar?" Starscream folded his arms. "I think you screwing up such a beautiful opportunity may be the only accurate thing they've managed to portray."

Skywarp glared.

"Uh, Screamer, you just woke up the Autobots," Thundercracker said, interrupting them.

"What?" Starscream glared at the screen. "That didn't happen!" He huffed air through his intakes. "At least I shot at them, unlike the rest of you."

"You _do_ remember this is Autobot propaganda, don't you Starscream?" Megatron demanded. "Stop acting like any of this... _slag_... is a reflection on any of us!" He turned to the spy. "Turn it off. I've seen enough. This 'cartoon' is so ridiculous, not even the humans would believe it. I foresee that this is one Autobot plan that will fail and be quickly forgotten."

"Pit, I hope so," Thundercracker muttered. "That's just _embarrassing._"


End file.
